so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander…. (1 Pe 3:16).
I’m living in this unhealthy place in my head sometimes.
“No one wanted you.”
“You don’t belong here.”
“Things will never be what they were for you.”
I often wonder what people think of me, but not in the way I should. I get concerned about their opinions because from the outside things might have “looked bad” in my life. Have you ever felt that way? So concerned about other people’s opinion about your life that you just couldn’t move forward?
Truth is, I still feel a little bit like a loser. I hate being a loser. I like being a winner. For many years nearly everything that I touched turned to gold and now it seems like nearly everything I try comes with pain, struggle and discouragement. Now, that’s not true for everything, but there’s this accompanying voice that tries to make me believe that I’m just a failure who can never be what I once was.
But maybe I’m not supposed to be what I once was and maybe you aren’t either. Maybe this place of struggle that you and I are in is really part of our purpose and destiny in Christ.
Truth is, all of those instances of struggle, loss and discouragement give us the opportunity to choose being a blessing over getting angry at our situations and the people in them. I have heard the Lord say to me time and time again, “Heather, cover that in grace.” There is so much freedom when we cover things in grace. Please, cover your anger, cover your desire to seek revenge or have justice in your own way.
I often wonder if God was knocking on the door if I would open it, because I’d be so busy trying to get the people in the room who didn’t notice me to see me. I’d probably miss His invitation in my life to move past it all. Have you ever done that? Stuck around a little too long or made an extra post on social media hoping “they” would notice? I hate that I deal with that, but I do.
The Lord has been reminding me in this present season that I have nothing to prove to anyone, but if I’m being honest, sometimes it feels like I do. I hate that. I don’t want to live thinking maybe they’ll notice me. Truth is, He always sees me and that is enough.
Friend, what others think of you it just doesn’t matter, except for what they think of Christ in you, now that really matters. When you feel put aside and forgotten remember that how you handle things moving forward really does make a difference. What others should see in you is a right response to love like Christ and not tear others down in the process. I haven’t always done that right, but they should see you offering praise and blessing, not slander and gossip.
So let it all go, and take up the grace that you and I have available through Christ. Then, what people will see in us is not something of our own nature to be impressed by, but something of greater worth than gold that draws them to the cross as we choose to make Him known in our lives and set aside our feelings to be a bondservant of Christ. No matter how painful the letting go of our ego might be. Won’t you join me in the letting go?
Father, life can be so hard and humbling. Forgive me for caring so much about what others think of me. Truly, I want them to care about what they see of Christ in me. Let that be what fills my heart and mind. I need more of Him and less of me. Let it be so, I pray, in Jesus name, Amen.
Heather Quiroz 